Super Geek Wars: Iron Man vs. Master Chief


Hope you all enjoy the new feature. It seems that Optimus Prime is and has been soundly kicking Amuro’s ass in our first match. I think I’ll keep the voting open until the next round, but I don’t see Amuro making up much ground. Zieg Prime!

Okay, this week we pit Iron Man against Master Chief. Someone mentioned that terrain may play a significant role in the last battle so I’ll try to keep that in mind when I stat em up against each other. And we’re looking at Iron Man in his current comic form and Master Chief in his Halo 2 form since my brother is the only one I personally know who knows about his new digs. Here goes:

  • Iron Man is the metal skin for Tony Stark. Chief sports the Mark VI armor. Both are perfectly suited for various forms of combat on multiple terrains. It’s not known if Master Chief functions that well under water, but I’m sure Tony’s got a solution for that. Iron Man can fly while Master Chief can jump pretty high in a low gravity environment, but the Mark VI is not equipped with boosters. Both armors enhance physical strength, although I suspect that Master Chief is physically stronger than Iron Man. And he’s 8 fucking feet tall!
  • Here’s where it gets tricky. The Mark VI armor is equipped with shield technology that protects him, kinda, from attack. Iron Man, at this point in his career, has plot armor. He needs GPS, he’s got GPS. He needs nanites, he’s got nanites. He needs remote control, he’s got remote control. He needs extra shielding, he’s got extra shielding. So there’s no real way to know if he’s got extra shielding technology or reinforced carbon fibers or some sort of low friction paint or whatever. You just have to pound on him and hope for the best.
  • We’re going to give Master Chief all the terran weapons to combat Tony’s plot armor. In the old days, Iron Man had non lethal repulsor blasts from his hands. Now, who the fuck knows. Does he have nanobots that could infest the Chief? Does he have an orbital satellite weapons platform that he can call at a moment’s notice? Who knows what the Chief will have to deal with when facing the Golden Avenger.
  • Personality wise, Tony Stark is a cocky playboy and recently revealed to be a complete ass hat (Cap was right you fuck tard!). Stark is also one of the smartest people on earth. Pair his super genius intellect with his Swiss Army Knife plot armor, it almost seems like he’s unbeatable. By contrast, Master Chief is stoic and focused. He doesn’t mince words. He doesn’t chase girls. He doesn’t give half a fuck what you think. He was bred for war and knows little else. He’s almost a force of nature.
  • It’s super genius versus ultimate soldier, plot armor versus practical war armor. Who takes it? Who’s ass kicking skills reign supreme?

    Super Geek Wars: Iron Man vs. Master Chief

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    Winner: MASTER CHIEF! chunliwin.gif