Super Election Wars: Asshole vs. Moral Oral

Been a while since we’ve run a proper Super Geek Wars poll. Logan easily defeated Manji. Poor guy. Even with his own anime now, always getting the shit end of the blade.

This week’s battle is slightly different and comes to us from a suggestion from AZM regular, Kevin Bahrt, and is inspired by this less than inspiring election cycle. Since we’ll never get the perfect kind of President that’s only seen in comics (Gaiman’s Prez from Sandman would totally get my vote), a true mixture of competence and moral character, let’s lower our standards for a bit. We pit the Asshole against the Moral Oral.

The Asshole is morally corrupt in his or her personal life but an absolute genius when it comes to the actual duties of the President. The Moral Oral is perfect moral role model but an absolute failure when it comes to his or her duties. When Katrina hit, the Asshole would have sent aid and relief workers right away and by now would have completely rebuilt New Orleans faster and stronger because he or she would have that technology. And then he or she would go home with a few hookers and some good blow to celebrate. The Moral Oral, having no actual experience or leadership skills beyond his or her moral standing, would do pretty much what our current administration did. Slow response, slow recovery, and no real solution to guard against future natural disasters.

You can’t get the best of both worlds in this fight. So what’s more important to you for President? Actual job performance or moral character? Do you care if the President bags hookers every night if the job is done right for once? Do you want your President to be someone everyone can look up to despite complete ineptitude? Party affiliation does not matter. Gender or ethnicity doesn’t matter. It’s character versus job performance, moral corruption versus moral…um… uncorruption, brilliant job performance versus complete fail, personal life versus public office. Vote now! Vote often! And fear not the chads, hanging or otherwise!

NOTE: I realize that this is probably not the best use of Boy Scout, but Moral Character Guy just didn’t fit the two syllable thing I was going for. See, I actually think about these crazy things I write sometimes. Honest!

UPDATE: Thanks to D-W, the Boy Scout is now Moral Oral. Makes more sense now kinda.

Super Election Wars: Asshole vs. Moral Oral


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