Friday, January 1st, 2010 at 12:27 pm by Jamie
It’s the New Year! Thank Krom. At the beginning of 2009 and 2008 I made a list of predictions and wishes for the coming year. Some came true but most were horribly inaccurate. So to continue the tradition, here are my predictions and wishes for 2010.
Predictions based somewhat on observations:
The next dead entertainment carcass for Hollywood to pick over for “new ideas” will be old-time radio. They’ve already started with the Green Hornet. But I wouldn’t be at all surprised to hear announcements for films of Philip Marlowe (actually, I’d see that), Johnny Dollar, Dragnet, I Was a Communist for the FBI, and other old-time radio shows.
Either Seth MacFarlane or Ellen DeGeneres will properly revive the Ed Sullivan styled variety show. Whoever thought Rosie was a good choice must have been sucking on some rotten hash.
Someone will forget how disappointed we were in Watchmen and decide that a Sandman or Death movie would be a good idea. Actually, Death: High Cost of Living would work well as a film. But I’m sure they’d fuck it in the ear.
Someone will forget how bad Frank Miller is at directing and give him the green light to direct another project, probably Ronin or even worse, an American adaptation of Lone Wolf and Cub.
The iSlate or iTablet or the Kindle or some e-reader out there will come out with a color version that handles graphics beautifully making buying comics on an e-reader actually worth while. This will prove to be such a financial boon for comic publishers that they will consider doing e-reader only editions of comics.
LED light bulbs become affordable enough to replace the CFLs. I made this prediction in 2008 and 2009 but I still see it on the horizon! Maybe this should be a wish.
The RIAA becomes completely obsolete as more and more bands offer their music directly to their fans through various online retailers like iTunes and Amazon etc. They close their doors forever. Oh, it’s coming RIAA you backwards hacks. It’s coming! This was one of my 2008 wishes, but I feel that it’s coming sooner than we may expect.
Newspapers ignore the lessons of the great micropayment experiments in the early years of the webcomic world and begin to implement these pay barriers for their content. Readers don’t buy in to the new pay structure and turn, once again, to blogs. Print circulation continues to decline.
DC’s graphic novel experiment, Earth One, proves to be a hit for comic fans and new readers alike. As a result, we see similar offerings from Marvel. Image, Darkhorse, and pretty much everyone else already publish books that are graphic novels and not just collections of floppies. Way to catch up guys.
Renewable energy continues to be a buzz word for 2010 without anyone in government actually doing a damn thing about it. This sparks off an era of green entrepreneurs who revolutionize the way we think about energy in 2010 forcing big changes in Congress.
Wishes based on absolutely nothing!
Audiences turn away from loud mouth partisan pundits like Glenn Beck and Keith Oberman and begin to make decisions for themselves. The era of the pundit ends and sanity returns to television news.
Airbender fails to perform well at the box office leading to the cancellation of the sequels. Hollywood begins to rethink their knee jerk habit of white washing casts and we begin to see more movies with minority leads.
“The Jersey Shore” finally proves that MTV has nothing relevant to say about anything and leads to the downfall of the network. Seriously, they need to be stopped.
The success of James Cameron’s A–Dances With the Last of the Smurfy Mohecan Samurai–vatar inspires him to actually start production on that long rumored live-action adaptation of Battle Angel Alita.
Paris Hilton reinvents herself and comes back as a socially conscious humanitarian and takes on human right’s issues in North Korea. It makes me laugh to even ponder such insanely improbable things!
Giant robot movies in America! No, Transformers doesn’t count. I’m talking about robots piloted by kids and shit like that! We have our Covlerfield Godzilla thing, now we need our Something Gundam thing!
Two words. Cloned Bacon!
Instead of importing tokusatsu shows like Power Rangers or Kamen Rider, an American homegrown tokusatsu show takes the world by storm and ushers in a new era of western tokusatsu!
Hip Hop stops sucking. This is from last year. And it hasn’t happened. And as long as fucking autotune is around, it’s unlikely to happen. But I wish and hope it will!
Penny Arcade TV actually gets a broadcast deal. The TLC camera crews roll in and Gabe and Tycho are the first webcomic creators ever to get a regular television show. This is followed, of course, by the weekly broadcast of Super Art Fight on the CW. Hey, we take what we can get!
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