Andy Lau is a Giant, Epic, Kung Fu Movie Star

AZM Ally Kensei Dave sent along this amazing trailer for a new Shaolin movie staring Jackie Chan, Wu Jing, Nicholas Tse, Fan Bingbing and Andy Lau. And it looks properly epic. No word on if anyone has picked it up for distribution here, but I’m sure it’s coming. It’s too epic not to.

Now I know he’s starred in a wide variety of movies, but lately it seems that Andy Lau is the go-to guy for these gigantic, kung fu epic films. Makes sense to me. He’s got the acting chops and the chop socky…um… chops to play the hero and carry the movie on his shoulders or the villain to give a hero the most fearsome antagonist ever. He’s such a great freaking gigantic movie star in China, I’m a little surprised no one has tapped him for anything here. See, if it were me and I was a Hollywood mucky mucky, early on in the casting process for that dumb fuck Airbender shitfest I would have courted Andy Lay real hard to play Fire Lord Ozai. Think about that shit for a minute. Andy mother fucking epic movie star Lau as Fire Lord Ozai. My god, that would be amazing.

I know why they didn’t do it. He’s too fucking good. Can you imagine pitting that little Noah Ringer kid against a power house like Andy Lau? Or that fucking Twilight idiot? All he has to do is look at those dweebs and they’d shit their pants. No one would believe that any of the kids cast could take on Andy Lau. He’s that damn good.

Or how about Andy Lau as the leader of the Cobra Kai or whatever they’re calling it in the new Karate Kid flick. Can’t you just see how awesome it would be to have Andy Lau training a bunch of twisted kids? And can’t you just see how amazingly powerful a confrontation between him and Jackie Chan would be?

Basically what I’m saying is that Andy Lau is a giant goddamn movie star. Could he fix some of this summer’s disasters. Yes. A thousand times yes. The idea of him as Fire Lord Ozai gives me full chubs. The world needs more Andy Lau. Time for China to share him. Or Hollywood to nab him. Or something to make it possible for me to watch more Andy Lau in the theater.