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Tele Archive

All hail the mighty idiot box! May its glorious reign never cease!


Let’s Do The Time Warp With High Speed Photography!

Wednesday, October 15th, 2008 at 9:56 am by Jami

Egg Smash
photo via Stefan

AZM Ally Henry Marx sent along some freaking amazing high-speed photography shots of various things going ’splody. Eggy, eggy break. By weird coincidence, Discovery Channel just started a new show called Time Warp where they take high-speed video of various things going splody as well. You can check out their site for interactive video examples that you can scrub through frame by frame. The one with the guy getting punched in the face is pretty crazy, but the one with the great big water balloon exploding in the guy’s face is amazing! The thing wraps around his whole head before popping!

[Via Web Urbanist and Discovery]



Batman Bebop

Monday, October 6th, 2008 at 9:32 am by Jami

Angry Zen Minion Kevin Bahrt sent along this trailer for the new Batman: The Brave and The Bold debuting this fall on Cartoon Network. How very Cowboy Bebop of them! The soundtrack for the trailer is clearly influenced by Yoko Kano’s “Tank!” which was kind of a tribute to those old 60’s action show themes anyway. It all comes full circle!

So who’ve we got here, Aquaman, Red Tornado (or as I like to call him, Aang the Last Airbender), Plastic Man, Green Arrow, The Atom, and Blue Beetle. The character designs have a sort of retro feel which fit the characters, although Blue Beetle seems a little out of place. But it looks like a lot of fun.

While I do really like how Warner Brothers has handled their animated DC properties, is there a point when they reach over saturation? Obviously they reach an audience and make decent amounts of cashola. But does this constant whoring of Batman damage the brand? We’ve got the Animated Series, The Adventures of Batman & Robin, Batman Beyond, The Batman, Justice League, Justice League Unlimited, Batman and Superman, and now The Brave and The Bold. Is it too much or does the audience really want more more more?

[Via Cartoon Network]



The Knight Rider Drinking Game!

Friday, October 3rd, 2008 at 11:39 am by Jami

Drunk Hoff

AZM Ally Mike Dent is sacrificing his sanity for you! The poor bastard has committed to watch five episodes of the new Knight Rider series so that you don’t have to. Feel his pain! So to help him survive the three remaining episodes he has before he can pull himself away, Mike Dent has created the Knight Rider Drinking Game! Mike makes no mention of the type of alcohol you should use while playing the game, but I suggest something very strong that will knock you out so you don’t have to suffer through an entire episode.

We here at AZM salute you, Mike!

[Via Justice Ace]



Gurren Lagann Makes You Hot For Sensei

Wednesday, October 1st, 2008 at 9:42 am by Jami

Before Gainax came along, I never associated giant robots with happy fun bags. Lalah’s newtype powers never gave her triple D bits. But then Evangelion dropped and we all kinds of underage boobage. So it’s little surprise that Gainax’s latest giant roboto show, Gurren Lagann, has great stonking jigglies as evidenced by this clip sent over by Angry Zen Minion Kevin Bahrt.

Yes, there be bouncing happy fun bags which is always happy. But had this clip lacked giant freaking robots going BOOM, well my friends, I would have looked elsewhere. I foresee adding Gurren Lagann to my Netflicks queue fairly soon!



Kamen Rider Saga

Tuesday, September 30th, 2008 at 11:48 am by Jami

Angry Zen Minion S.Blue sent along this clip of Kamen Rider Saga’s henshin and finisher sequence. Saga appears to be quite a sick fuck of a rider. You’d never know from the looks of his sissy rapier, but his finishing move is fucking evil. Almost feel sorry for the Fangire.

In other Rider news, there’s going to be another Den-O movie?! What the fuck! How is Den-O so popular? Ugh.



Not Even Shirtless Driving Can Save New Knight Rider From Shark Tank

Thursday, September 18th, 2008 at 12:18 pm by Jami

knightriderfail.jpg

When AZM Ally Mike Dent messaged me to tell me “Word of warning: New Knight Rider sucks ass,” I responded “Well DUUUUUUUUUH!” Without even seeing an episode, I could smell the stench of fail from just the commercial. Sadly, Mike Dent was not so wise. The poor bastard sat through an entire episode on purpose because, well, Knight Rider sounds fucking cool! Oh paper, yes, it probably sounded like a good idea. But if Knight Rider 2000, Knight Rider 2010, and Team Knight Rider all sucked fat donkey scrote, why would a 2008 update be any different? Mike has written up a scathing review over at Justice Ace. He sacrificed his brain meats so that the rest of us would not have to suffer through the same horror.

Thank you Mike Dent. You are indeed a brave man.

[Via Justice Ace]



Avatar Movie Without the “Avatar”

Tuesday, September 16th, 2008 at 9:58 am by Jami

Ang Airbender

Audrey and I have been catching up with Avatar on Netflicks. We just finished the second disc of Book 3: Fire and we’ve become big fans. With that in mind, I’m not so sure I want to see a live-action version.

M. Night Shyamalan will direct The Last Airbender set for release on July 2, 2010. Notice that the word “Avatar” has been cut from the title. That’s because James Cameron is directing his own Avatar film which has no relation to the show. The live-action adaptation is planned as a trilogy with the first film dealing with Book One: Water.

I’m iffy on this. Sure, Shyamalan is a big fan of the show. But I’m a bit skeptical. He has yet to demonstrate that he can tell a story straight up letting the characters develop the plot. Avatar is a heavily character driven show and I feel Shyamalan is at times, way too into plot twists and intricate reveals.

My other problem is that it’s difficult for me to imagine actors in the roles of the characters. However, Dante Basco must be cast as Zuko. Must I say! And I think Emmanuelle Chriqui would be perfect for Katara. Mako would have be brilliant as Uncle Iro, but that won’t happen. So let’s play the casting game! Who would you cast as Aang, Katara, Sokka, Toth, Zuko, Azula, or whoever?

[Via Buddy TV]



In a World Where Movie Trailers Have Lost Their Voice

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008 at 8:49 am by Jami

We’ve all heard his voice, but until that Geico commercial spot a few years back, those of use who aren’t voice actors never knew his name. Don LaFontaine made over 750,000 television spots and 5,000 movie trailers over his 33 year career. On Monday at age 68, he passed away.

I’m so impressed that until just a few years ago, few of us knew who he was. That’s a real testament to his humility. Certainly LaFontaine was the best at what he did. Movie trailers are going to sound a little less awesome.

Thanks to Greg, Paul Jang, and Varazakazarav for the sad news.

[Via AP]

Tags Movies, Tele


Generate 3D Textures From Only Two Photos

Friday, August 29th, 2008 at 9:37 am by Jami

Hawk sent me this article about a quick method for generating 3D textures. The system interprets the difference in pixel brightness between two photos, one taken with and one taken without flash, to reconstruct depth. It’s much quicker than constructing depth maps or normal maps by hand, but it has its limitations. If you have vines or branches over a rock wall, the system cannot interpret those as separate features. Still, the results are pretty damn good.

You know, pretty soon they’re going to develop a consumer grade camera that just scans whatever is in the viewfinder, stores it in 3D, and dumps it out onto your computer as geometry that you can stick into a virtual environment and explore.

[Via New Scientist]



Computers Are Tired of Your Abuse

Tuesday, August 26th, 2008 at 3:53 pm by Jami

It appears that Skynet has manufactured harmless looking boxes with the ability to fight back.

This is a sketch from BBC 3’s late night sketch comedy show, The Wrong Door. You can head on over to their website to see the first full episode online. I like the giant robot lumbering around their site. Such a great design.

I hope Sci Fi or some other network picks it up for American distribution. Just looks too fun not to share with the rest of us!

[Via The Wrong Door]





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